Oh no.. back again in my OLD way.. huhu.. help..

Here we go again… school or church???  Priority? Priority ??  Priority??? Last term, I will never forget what happen to me… I receive two “palo”. One is that I have this sakit sa kidney and the other one is that I have failed two subjects, computer programming(compro) ad alge because of prioritizing more on my academics  rather than God. Thanks to one of my CCC friends, who advised me what to do. He shared to me the verse, Matt.16:23 which really struck me.. it says," Seek first the kingdom of God and all this things shall be added unto you." Because that time,the thing on my head is ARAL, ARAL, ARAL, kaya tuloy I forgot doing all my quiet time, devotions, and other stuffs…

But now sa second term, I have this feeling that I am going back again and doing what I have done before. I know that there is this something that I should do but im not doing anything at all. Honestly, for instance, I am not doing again my quiet time. I have also some some responsibilities sa church like sa choir and for the past few weeks ay hindi na naman ako nakakapunta. The same thing sa teaching ministry ko, Sunday school and BYF, I am teaching but it really shows that that I am not prepared palagi. And also sa BYF(Baptist Youth Fellowship),as the president of this quite big youth organization(that includes churches from NCR and Central and Northern Luzon), I know that I am not doing my responsibilities as well. Hay, hindi na talaga ako maguglat kung makareceive ulit ako ng “palo”, malay mo that next thing that will happen is baka masagasan na lang ko bigla or whatever.. pero wag naman sana…

People kept also asking me, “o, kamusta ka naman”. Then I will say, “OK lang naman”, but deep inside my heart I know that I am not that really ok. One of the problems that I have now is also having REST,though rarely sometimes wala naman talaga ako ginagawa. Rest or church??? My sched is like this, Mon-Fri sa school, Sat- half day sa school half day sa church for the choir practice and teaching flute(recorder) to children, then Sunday, whole day naman sa church, paminsan from 7am-7pm, that’s merely 12 hours and sometimes more than pa, not including yung gigising ka pa ng 5am or earlier… My mom told me na wag na lang din ako magattend choir if pasulpotsulpot lang din naman ako., but the thing is paguwi ako, paminsan uutusan lang din naman ako.. so what’s the point?! Waaaah!!!

Hay naku, actually you can compare me with the Israelites when they are travelling to the Promise Land. There are times na susunod sila but after some time they will complain and disobey then God will punish them, then susunod ulit sila. Tapos ganun ulit.. palo, sunod, disobey.. palo, sunod,disobey.. Alam ko naman na God should be the first priority of our lives than anything else, but the thing is wala akong gingawang solution to my problem.. oh no, I need to do something about this, I REALLY NEED TO DO SOMETHING  or else PALO na naman aabutin ko and the worst thing that may happen is pauwiin na lang ko ni God in His home.. so, if that really happens, you know what the reason is… But still I really thank God that He gives this trials in my life. I know this things will mold me to be a better person. Naalala ko yung isa sa mga favorite ko na verse.. Rom 8:28, “and we know that all things work together for good to them who love God, to them who are called according to His purpose.” It says that all the things that are happening in our life right now is for our own goodness.. so continue to thank God, even in the midst of many problems..